"[My relationships were] like I was in these movies where the script was only half-written. When I’d get to the end of this half-script, the other actors wanted me to ad lib. But I had never gotten the hang of that. That’s why these movies were always box-office failures. Six of them in the past twenty years. I always blew the lines." ~ from my horrible first novel "Learn How To Pretend." (unpublished)(obviously)

Monday, October 15, 2012

My personality

What does Helen Fisher have to say about me? I took the free personality profile at Chemistry.com and this is what it told me.

I'm a Negotiator/ Director. Which is weird to me considering what the other two choices were. I would have certainly considered myself more in the builder explorer camp.

According to the site:
"You have a broad overview of reality. You like to tackle large, complex issues and weigh all the variables involved. And you can be innovative and bold, generating new perspectives and providing imaginative solutions to ambiguous social, political, intellectual or technical problems.
You have fine tuned social skills, easily picking up the gestures, facial expressions and speech patterns of others and expressing yourself clearly and vividly. You are intuitive, too; you understand people, and genuinely sympathize with them. Because you are also flexible and cooperative, you are also good at working in teams.
Yet despite your poise in social situations, you often prefer solitude or informed and detailed conversations with just one individual or a few close friends. You try to avoid routine meetings and social engagements. You prize your independence.
You like to focus deeply and thoroughly on your interests. You can be exacting, tough-minded, analytical and strategic in your approach, too. You leave no stone unturned."
Well, some of this is true. Some of it is clearly my avoidance and my codependence.
In regard to relating to others, though, it said
"You seek an authentic connection with just about everyone you meet, and you want to have in-depth discussions with friends and colleagues about ideas and feelings. You do not suffer fools gladly; "small talk" leaves you cold."
Well, the suffering fools gladly comment is one I always reserved for my ex. I suppose if I were to be honest, I don't duffer them either. I avoid them like the plague. But the bit about "authentic connections" is spot on. I don't like shallowness.

Regarding Love Relationships, Chemistry.com had this to say:
"You are idealistic and romantic. You want to bond in a spiritual sense, communicate your innermost feelings and sustain an intense and meaningful relationship. You have a rich fantasy life. And, for you, sex must be mixed with romance and meaning. When you find true love, you focus your attention on your beloved. You give thoughtful gifts, are sensitive to your mate's feelings and communicate your emotions clearly. You are capable of unconditional love. You can be irreverent about traditional marriage, however. You feel your personal commitment is the true marriage vow. In fact, you may be inclined to write your own vows and create a non-traditional wedding ceremony. You unconsciously gravitate to those who are imaginative and playful with ideas. You also like those with an unruffled calm and decisiveness, those who are ambitious, and those who can focus on their goals-individuals who complement your restless soul-searching."
Right?! Yeah. I'm that most loathed of men -- the hopeless romantic.


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